16: Stella.
He’s incredible out there.
Watching Gage sail the ball down the field, take tackles, run like the wind, find gaps in the defense, I can’t help but marvel. I’m in the family box with the wives of the coaches and various
administrators. They have all been very kind to me, even if they
did look a little puzzled when I arrived with four hulking security guards with guns. Most of the wives aren’t paying attention to the game. They’re most interesting in catching up with each other and talking about their children, so I sit alone, glued to the
glass.
How is that machine down on the field the same man who holds
me so tenderly? How is that the same man whose mouth makes
love to mine slowly one second, becoming demanding in the
next? He seems so far away. Like maybe everything that has
taken place since I met him was a dream. He’s everyone’s
fantasy, isn’t he? Maybe he’s mine. Maybe I imagined it all.
But no.
The chafing on my thighs tells me we’re real. The heavy ring
sitting around my throat like a collar means the last week truly
happened.
You will marry me, Stella.
16: Stella.
Truer words were never spoken. I’m not sure I could make it a
day without his arms around me. Without his skin warming mine. I’m in love. I’m so in love, it’s practically painful. I never
could have imagined this deep, consuming brand of passion
before now. But I’m letting it take me. I’m being sucked down
into the inky darkness of obsession along with Gage and it’s
exhilarating. I can hear every breath I take, loud and echoing in
my head. I have permanent goosebumps. My breasts feel
exposed, even fully covered, because they’ve been so well
loved. Sucked and squeezed and bitten. Even though I speak
and nod at everyone who addresses me, I’m thinking of him.
Getting back to him.
1 blow out a shuddering breath, fogging up the glass in front of
- me. I am not going to let my schoolwork suffer, even though my
relationship with Gage is huge and overwhelming. I cannot fail
to seize the opportunity I was given. There has to be something
just for me. The way he has football, I have academics. I can’t allow anything to derail me from that.
That will be easier said than done, I’m guessing.
Down on the field, Gage takes a hard tackle and I make a
helpless sound, my shaking hand pressing to the glass until he stands up, jogs toward the huddle. Slowly, I let out the concrete
breath in my lungs, my attention straying to the game clock.
Five more minutes. We’re ahead by ten. Unless the other team
really turns it on, another championship is in the bag. I’m so
16: Stella.
happy for Gage. He needed this. He needed to know he could
love football on his own, even though he shared the sport so
closely with his father. I can’t wait to hold him later, tell him how
proud I am of him for overcoming such a tragedy. For emerging
better than ever.
A cheer goes up in the family box moments later, the wives
exchanging a hug. Two of them even pull me into an embrace,
making me laugh and blush.
And then they all begin clearing out of the room.
“Oh…” I catch up to one of the wives. “I was asked to wait here
until Gage comes to get me. Is that all right?”
“We have to clear out,” one of my security guards answers to
my right. “It’s an insurance thing. The game ran late and there’s
only coverage until ten pm.”
“Oh. Okay.”
The woman lays a hand on my arm. “Are you going to be all
right, dear? Or would you like a ride home from one of us?”
Looking back toward the glass, I can see Gage down on the
field. His helmet is off now and he’s being interviewed, a
microphone held in front of his face. His attention continually
strays up to the box, but I don’t think he can see me, due to the
glare of the lights. None of his teammates are being bombarded
by reporters. They’ve all left the field. And my spine can’t help
16: Stella.
but straighten with pride. Of course they want to speak with
him, he was amazing out there. Game MVP according to the
giant screen above the stadium.
There’s a good chance Gage will be busy for a while. However,
instinctively I know he would probably lose his temper if I left
without him. Or took a ride from someone without discussing it
with him beforehand. Yes, that’s really controlling of him. His
behavior is highhanded and sort of irrational–do I really need a
security team?-but I won’t pretend I don’t like him caring for
me, even in the craziest of ways. For so long, I barely existed. No one hugged me, let alone spoke to me. I was a shadow. He
makes me feel like an entire planet.
“I’ll be fine,” I say to the coach’s wife, smiling. “Thank you for the
offer, but Gage asked me to wait for him.”
I retrieve my purse, tucking it under my arm, and I let the
security team lead me down the buzzing hallway to a freight
elevator. We take it down to field level and I suck in a surprised
breath when the elevator doors open, revealing total pandemonium. Fans and players alike have uncorked bottles of champagne and they’re spraying it at each other. A big bucket
of Gatorade is dumped on a man’s head. There are reporters
and screaming students and flashes going off. It’s exciting. I’ve
never witnessed something like this up close.
In a relative daze, I start to walk off the elevator, but one of the
guards stays me with a hand on my elbow. “I think we should
16: Stella
wait somewhere else.”
He’s probably right, but…this is my boyfriend’s world. Should I get used to it? I understand he’s protective of me, but I can’t always be sheltered in the background. “I would rather stay
here, if that’s okay.”
The guards seem uneasy, so I step off the elevator before one
of them stops me. Someone hands me a red solo cup of beer and I laugh, taking a sip. The crisp night air combined with the magic of victory is wonderful. Knowing I’ll be home with my boyfriend soon is equally incredible. I’m just about to take my first sip of beer when one of the players stops in front of me, his
jersey soaked in champagne and sweat from the game.
“There she is. The unsung hero of this game.” He turns to the crowd of celebrating fans. “Hey everyone! This is the girl who
tutored Weston. She’s the reason he passed the test so he
could play tonight. Give it up!”
I’m stunned when they cheer for me. Loudly. So loudly that I fall
back a step.
“Mr. Weston made it clear he didn’t want her speaking with
anyone outside of the family box,” says the head of my security
team.
“Ah, I’m one of his receivers,” says the player, waving him off.
“That makes me family.” Ignoring the continued protests from
16: Stella.
my guard, the receiver smiles back down at me. There is something in his expression that makes my stomach feel
hollow, but it’s probably just me. I’m still not used to speaking
with strangers. “So are you going to continue tutoring Gage?”
“If he needs it,” I say, cradling the solo cup to my chest. “But it…
i–it might be a conflict of interest now—”
“Since you’re dating?”
His eyes are on the ring around my neck. When they travel lower
to my breasts, I tamp down on the urge to squirm. “Yes. Since
we’re dating.”
“Yeah,” he says slowly. “He scooped you right off the market
before any of us poor assholes got a chance to shoot our shot.”
His gaze meanders down to my thighs, lingering on my
stockings. “Only the best for our superstar, right?”
The hint of bitterness in his tone keeps me silent. I don’t know
how to respond.
He leans in, dropping his voice to a whisper. “But we both know
it’s not real, don’t we?”
Pins and needles prickle my scalp. “What do you mean?”
“Gage told us.” When I say nothing, he looks at me like I should know. Like we’re in on some secret together. “That he’s dating the smart girl for his image. So he’ll look good for the scouts. He
16: Stella.
needed something to convince them he’d settled down after all
the delinquent shit he pulled. And here you are.” Surveying my
body openly, he licks his lips. “Although I’m sure he’s having one
hell of a time…pretending.”
I don’t realize I’ve dropped the red cup until beer splashes up
onto my shins.
My stomach is in a puddle on the ground along with the drink,
my ears ringing, eyes stinging with such intensity, I can barely
see what’s around me.
No. No, it’s not true.
Is it?
Does Gage want to marry me so soon because he’ll have an
easier time being scouted? Was I naïve to think he just loved
me so much he couldn’t wait?
“You know,” the player continues. “I’d appreciate you so much.
more than him.”
Those words bounce right off. Just noise. Through gritty eyes, I
survey the crowd. I look at the girls who are obviously more
suited to dating a famous quarterback. Confident, capable of
talking to strangers without stuttering. Was I stupid to believe this relationship with Gage was authentic? It seems real. More
real than anything. But what do I know? I’ve never been in a relationship before in my life.
16: Stella.
Humiliation turns my skin red. People are staring at me because
I spilled my drink and I’m making no move to pick it up or clean myself off.
I have to get out of here.
I have to get away.
Turning on a heel, I dash for the tunnel leading to the perimeter
of the field, taking my guards by surprise. The audience has cleared out by now, so there is no crowd to slow me down on my way to the parking lot. I dash through those lingering behind and despite the shouting of my name in the distance, I don’t stop running until I’m off campus, my heart shattered in my
chest.
